My grandmother used to keep a daily journal and I always got a kick out of the way she noted her more boring days; she called them her “Nothing Days.” On Friday, I had my own Nothing Day: the weather was cool and gloomy and I was tired! We all bummed around the house and I cozied up with a hot cup of coffee and a book (affiliate link) for most of the afternoon. So in lieu of anything exciting to record, I thought I would instead share a favorite pastime here at the Big White Farmhouse: Dad Jokes. Technically, we should call them “Mum Jokes” because I love them. The cornier, the better! Here are a few of the latest jokes I’ve sprung on my poor children:
What do you call a mischievous egg? A practical yolker!
A man tried to start a fight by throwing dough, shredded cheese, and tomato sauce at me. So I said, “You wanna pizza me?”
What kind of vegetable do you get when an elephant walks through your garden? Squash.
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, “Wow! In all my years tending bar, I’ve never had a weasel stop by! What can I get you?” “Pop,” goes the weasel.
A man is driving down a country road, when he spots a farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing. The man gets out of the car, walks all the way out to the farmer and asks him, “Ah excuse me mister, but what are you doing?” The farmer replies, “I’m trying to win a Nobel Prize.” “How?” asks the man, puzzled. “Well, I heard they give the Nobel Prize … to people who are out standing in their field.”
hehehe I liked the pizza one. Happy mother’s day!
Thank you!