The Big White Farmhouse | intentional living, little by little

October 31, 2023

No.774: What I Read in October 2023

This post contains affiliate links, which means I may receive a commission of any sale made at no extra cost to you.

#73. THE CORTISOL CONNECTION: WHY STRESS MAKES YOU FAT AND RUINS YOUR HEALTH – AND WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT by Shawn Talbott, PhD, FACSM // ★★★★☆
(amazon // bookshop // better world books)

First line: “Perhaps one of the most poignant realizations in health and medical research during the last two or three decades is that our bodies, including our nervous systems and endocrine (hormonal) systems, were simply not meant for the unique stresses that we face as part of our everyday life in the twenty-first century.”

A big part of this book is the idea that “wedging another stress-management technique into [an] already busy [life] does little more than add further stress” (p.25) and there has to be a better way. The author’s solution is what he calls the SENSE Lifestyle Program, which stands for Stress management, Exercise, Nutrition, Supplementation, and Evaluation. All in all, I found the book really helpful, with lots of information that I can research further to see what works for me. There’s hope for me yet!

#74. WE CROSSED A BRIDGE AND IT TREMBLED: VOICES FROM SYRIA by Wendy Pearlman // ★★★☆☆
(amazon // bookshop // better world books)

First line: “One evening in the fall of 2012, I met Rima on a breeze-filled balcony in Amman, Jordan.”

This is a collection of anecdotal accounts from people living in Syria during the Arab Spring up to current times. (It was published in 2017.) Although I didn’t love the book’s formatting, I still found the stories to be informative and incredibly heartbreaking. So much I didn’t know and would like to understand! Because of that, I’ve already added quite a few books on this topic to my TBR. 3.5 stars.

#75. THE BEEKEEPER’S APPRENTICE by Laurie R. King // ★★★☆☆
(amazon // bookshop // better world books)

First line: “I was fifteen when I first met Sherlock Holmes, fifteen years old with my nose in a book as I walked the Sussex Downs, and nearly stepped on him.”

I should probably preface this by saying that this mystery gets really great reviews, so maybe I’m just a curmudgeon. King re-imagines Sherlock Holmes in his retirement days and introduces a new character into his life: a smart 15-year-old girl named Mary. I found the book well written, but Mary is certainly portrayed as a feminist ideal – she can do no wrong and is great at everything! A bit tiring to read for 300+ pages.

#76. THE BURGESS BIRD BOOK FOR CHILDREN by Thornton W. Burgess // ★★★★☆
(amazon // bookshop)

First line: “Lipperty-lipperty-lip scampered Peter Rabbit behind the tumble-down stone wall along one side of the Old Orchard.”

The kids and I started this read aloud last school year and finally finished up this month. So charming! We all really enjoyed it and learned a lot about birds too.

#77. THE DAY I DIED by Lori Rader-Day // ★★★☆☆
(amazon // bookshop // better world books)

First line: “On the day I died, I took the new oars down to the lake.”

The blurb on the back of the book was intriguing: a handwriting analysis expert joins a case after a two-year-old boy goes missing. Well, that was this book…except it wasn’t. There was so much going on that had nothing to do with the case, secrets and side stories and obvious omissions so as not to spoil the reveal at the end. A decently paced read, but I was happy to be done.

#78. THE LCP SOLUTION: THE REMARKABLE NUTRITIONAL TREATMENT FOR ADHD, DYSLEXIA, AND DYSPRAXIA by B. Jacqueline Stordy and Malcolm J. Nicholl // ★★★★☆
(amazon // bookshop // better world books)

First line: “They are the hidden handicaps.”

What an uplifting, encouraging book! Some of my children have struggled with dyslexia and apraxia for a decade and this is the book I wish I had read back in the beginning. We have started following the book’s advice and have already seen some positive changes!

#79. THE LAST FLIGHT by Julie Clark // ★★★★☆
(amazon // bookshop // better world books)

First line: “Terminal 4 swarms with people, the smell of wet wool and jet fuel thick around me.”

Two women, desperate to escape their living situations, meet at an airport bar and decide to swap plane tickets. They both hope the change of location will help them start a new life, but then tragedy strikes: one of the planes crashes and everyone on board is dead. What does the remaining woman do now? I flew through this one! 3.5 stars, rounded up.

#80. ENEMY: A TRUE STORY OF COURAGE, CHILDHOOD TRAUMA AND THE COST OF WAR by Ruth Clare // ★★★☆☆
(amazon)

First line: “I was born into the war still raging inside my father.”

Oh man. This was a hard one to read. This heartbreaking memoir was one woman’s story about growing up in a family shattered by PTSD and physical abuse. I really appreciated that Clare showed how war wasn’t only detrimental to veterans, but also to their families at home. A powerful reminder, especially in these tense and uncertain days. 3.5 stars. (And thank you to Netgalley for the opportunity to read this book. Enemy was published in May 2023!)

MY UNREAD SHELF PROJECT

Unread Books as of January 1, 2023: 207
Books Finished in October: 8
Finished Books Donated/Sold in October: 3
Books Added: +6
Unread Books Remaining: 204

October 24, 2023

No.773: My Mother Culture Commonplace Book // October 2023

As you know, I’m a cheerleader for being an active producer vs. a passive consumer and education definitely falls in that active category. (It takes effort to think/process new information!) I’m bringing back the Mother Culture Commonplace Book series (again) to share some of the things I’ve been learning. Here’s what I’ve been reading/watching/listening to lately…

This post contains affiliate links, which means I may receive a commission of any sale made at no extra cost to you.

A Cautionary Warning from Syria

Before the revolution, I thought that Syria was for Assad. Syria was just the place where I lived, but it didn’t belong to me. When the revolution began, I discovered that Syria was my country. As Kurds, we had thought that we were oppressed and others were favored by the regime. After the revolution we discovered that we were all suffering from the same oppression. We discovered that we had not been working together, and that is how the regime was able to dominate us. – Cherin, a mother from Aleppo, We Crossed a Bridge and It Trembled: Voices from Syria, p.89

Families and ADHD, Dyslexia & Apraxia

I’m always on the hunt for ways to help my dyslexic children and most recently have been reading the book, The LCP Solution: The Remarkable Nutritional Treatment for ADHD, Dyslexia and Dyspaxia by B. Jacqueline Stordy, PhD. She begins the book by discussing how family history largely predetermines your chances of inheriting a learning disorder, which has been true in our family. Turns out that it’s long been recognized that learning disorders such as ADHD, dyslexia, and dyspraxia run in families and many children have one or more. Look at these statistics:

As many as 65% of children with ADHD also struggle with at least one other learning disorder.
50% of dyspraxic children also have ADHD.
Some 30-50% of children with dyslexia have ADHD and vice versa.

The Burning Rates of Natural vs. Synthetic Materials

My son is a volunteer firefighter and is going through academy right now. He is learning so much and then teaches me when he comes home! One of the videos he shared with me showed the flashover times of a living room filled with natural materials vs. one with synthetics. Scary!

October 16, 2023

No.772: Homemaking Notes on a Monday // Vol.48

This post contains affiliate links, which means I may receive a commission of any sale made at no extra cost to you.

The weather outside is //

As I look outside my window // Fall is in full swing. The morning temperatures are quite crisp now; I’ve had to pull out my big Carhartt for morning chores. Yellow leaves fall from the trees like confetti. The garden has been mostly put to bed for the season, just a few more areas to weed and amend. The pace on the farm is slowing and a winter of rest is on the horizon. We’re so close! I think I can, I think I can…

As I look around the house // Four pumpkins picked from a local farm sit in a row on the kitchen table, ripe and waiting to be carved into jack-o’-lanterns. Our kitchen island is overflowing with eggs. I have a pile of warm, cozy blankets to wash and pile into the living room baskets. It’s so trite to say nowadays, but I have always loved this time of year.

Thinking about // this poem from Mary Oliver:

“I Worried” by Mary Oliver

I worried a lot. Will the garden grow, will the rivers
flow in the right direction, will the earth turn
as it was taught, and if not how shall
I correct it?

Was I right, was I wrong, will I be forgiven,
can I do better?

Will I ever be able to sing, even the sparrows
can do it and I am, well,
hopeless.

Is my eyesight fading or am I just imagining it,
am I going to get rheumatism,
lockjaw, dementia?

Finally I saw that worrying had come to nothing.
And gave it up. And took my old body
and went out into the morning,
and sang.

I’m less a worrier and more of an overthinker, a predict-er, a planner, a Plan A/B/C-er. While that way of thinking is sometimes helpful, it’s also so very exhausting. Lately, I’ve been practicing the art of going outside with a blank mind. No lists or plans, just intentionally seeking and naming beauty in my own backyard. Harder than it sounds (!!) but a good challenge. I feel a lot of peace when I can accomplish it.

On this week’s to-do list //
– work on refilling/stocking “winter emergency packs” for each vehicle
– start switching out the kids’ wardrobes
– pack away my summer dresses and bring out the sweaters
– move Fred from pasture into the permanent pig paddock
– work on my junk journal
– give the little boys’ haircuts

Currently reading //

Fiction: The Day I Died by Lori Rader-Day
Nonfiction: The LCP Solution: The Remarkable Nutritional Treatment for ADHD, Dyslexia & Dyspraxia by B. Jacqueline Stordy PhD, Enemy: A True Story of Courage, Childhood Trauma and the Cost of War by Ruth Clare and Land of Hope: An Invitation to the Great American Story by Wilfred M. McClay
Religious: The Catholic Mass: Steps to Restore the Centrality of God in the Liturgy by Bishop Athanasius Schneider

On the menu this week //

Monday: loaded breakfast enchiladas
Tuesday: white chicken chili
Wednesday: meatballs with mashed potatoes
Thursday: Refrigerator Cleanout Night
Friday: tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches

October 12, 2023

No.771: How I Turned Around

I recently came across something I had written in my phone’s notes app way back in the fall of 2020. That spring had been one big unfamiliar, nerve-wracking situation and I was doing my best to bear the unknowns as best as I could. (I kept a 12-week lockdown diary here on the blog.) At some point, I remember thinking, “I have to find a better way to cope with all of this,” and this list in my phone must have been my reflections on what I did. I’m copying it here because while the situation is different, the stress is the same. I needed the reminder that with time, prayer and effort, I can turn this ship around. Again.

1. I said goodbye to unnecessary fear.

I stopped constantly reading the news and turned off social media. I had to do a complete detox at first, but have slowly added it back in in a healthier way. A good motto: Don’t let others’ emotions dictate your own. Keep a level head, think for yourself.

2. I started taking better care of myself.

I gained weight due to the constant stress and emotional eating, so I:

Limited sugar and things that caused me inflammation (like dairy)
Focused on movement, in whatever form that comes
Took my vitamins and supplements
Was mindful about what foods weren’t good for my slightly elevated blood pressure

3. I focused on the causes of my stress.

One of my stressors was not being prepared for the lockdown and then worrying about having enough to eat. To combat that, I started picking up a few extra things here and there to stock up the pantry.

4. I stopped myself from dwelling too far into the future.

I like to have a plan but have learned the unknowns are too great. I instead started focusing on just this week, this month.

5. Gratitude. Always gratitude.

What a gift that this word was my choice back in January. It carried me through.

6. I said lots and lots of prayers.

Prayers for our health and safety sure, but also for wisdom and understanding, for prudence, for clarity, for greater trust. For docility to His will, for peace in whatever comes our way. For a greater understanding of the death that comes to each of us someday and how I can live in such a way that I’m ready, whenever that day may come.